“SWEATERS formed late 2008 when 4 of Los Angeles’ finest musicians came together to make something timeless. There have been nights of parties. There have been nights of toil and hardship. There have been endless nights. There have been nights loaded with fulfilling sleep. Out of all of this constants have emerged. Sweaters pushes through it all. This band is a shark moving relentlessly in order to push the life-giving water of its surrounding space through its gills. In these uncertain times, no matter where the moon sits in the sky, whether SWEATERS is up or down, let us be clear on three constants:These boys, these SWEATERS, are rabble-rousers.

These men, these fine young men, make the truest music to come out of Los Angeles in a dog’s age.

Most importantly of all, and you must remember this: these boys know how to live.”

BUY YOUR SKYMALL / INVESTIGATIONS 7″ HERE AT SLOWDEATH

BUY YOUR TICKETS HERE. MAKE MOVES AS TICKETS ARE FLYING

Ya know its a shame, our living a short 20 or so miles from the beach, but never seeing it.  I blame the land sharks, sharks with white teeth and tan skin, kite surfing in the mornings, drinks at Sharky’s after work.  Well here’s proof that we don’t hate the beach we hate the sharks.

The great Jai Paul, enigmatic and Raccoon-obsessed has dropped on the scene and Slow Death is feelin’ it. Hobofm, Dontdiewondering, and even the dreaded Pitchfork have all laid praise to this London phenom. Take a listen and hear the truth.

Jai Paul – BTSTU

Our homie Dev, aka lightspeed champion, aka blood orange, rolled through Heathrow airport en route to NYC from Paris and got fucked.  On his way home to gather some things before leaving NY for months, Dev was met with a series of unfortunate events.  In adherence to the stringent Heathrow rules, Dev got to the airport in London two hours before his flight.  The destination options on the Virgin Airlines electronic kiosque read many strange and far-off locales including Dubai, but not including his desired destination of JFK.

So, like any other disgusted and frustrated traveler, Dev waited impatiently in line for 40 minutes with no movement.  He found a special desk for despondent travelers where a woman informed him that she had found his reservation; however, after his long wait he was 1 hr and 15 mins early for the flight and would not be able to board.  His only option was a seat on a plane leaving the following day with a sneak-attack 500 pound cancellation fee.  Dogged as he was and British as he is, Dev politely inquired, “Surely something can be done.” The woman responded, “Sorry, What?”–indicating to Dev that she was neither listening nor concerned.

At this point the details are fuzzy.  Lightspeed bugged out, placing his middle-finger on the forehead of a Virgin employee, after which he smashed a luggage cart against the dispensing machine, causing a ruckus the likes Heathrow has never seen.  He was, in short, thrown out of the airport by security.  He is, in short, our hero.  Dev has stood up to airport injustice, which goes unpunished day in and day out.  Unfortunately for him, the only flight he was able to take was a direct flight to LA leaving our man with three shirts for three months, stranded in the abyss we call Silverlake.  Please send Slow Death any donations for our young warrior.

The Slow Death showcase (word of mouth only) at South by South West, meant to hold 200 people max, was packed out this past Saturday with 800 cool-guys strong.  The Southern Mansion just off Sixth street saw stellar performances by Blank Dogs, Wavves, Theophilus London, POPO, Major Lazer, Rick Ross, Jadakiss, and a special face-fucking shoutout by 95′ allstars Bone Thugs ‘n Harmony…Bum Bum Bum Bum, Bum, Bum, Bum.  Needless to say, we killed it.

Bone Thugs ‘N Harmony – Crossroads

Bring yourself!  We got a two-fer this Thursday, February 4th.  Jesse, aka Belief, aka Ping Pong, aka AKA, aka Black Magic is turning 31 years old.  He will be doing some semi-interesting things in the early evening, but when the beat strikes around 10pm he and his will be heading over to Cheetahs Bikini Bar for a booty slapping good time.  If you love him as he deserves to be loved, eat with this man, sleep with this man, dance with this man, and whatever you do don’t dog this man!

Fat Boys – Don’t You Dog Me

I can’t believe 9002 is already over. Y9K shut my hologram down for like 7 seconds. Slow Death will be celebrating its 6,994th birthday this year and boy am I tired of Tall Hands. Let’s get things kicking this year with a classic from all the way back in 2009.

Ty Segall & Mikal Cronin – I Wear Black